


Don't Keep Me Waiting

by dusktillmidnight



Series: You Never Knew [2]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Buckley-Diaz Family (9-1-1 TV), Christopher Diaz is a National Treasure, Eventual Happy Ending, Firehouse 118 Crew as Family (9-1-1 TV), Fluff, M/M, Minor Carlos Reyes/TK Strand, Minor Maddie Buckley/Howie "Chimney" Han, Oblivious Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Pining Evan "Buck" Buckley, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-16 21:27:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29956110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dusktillmidnight/pseuds/dusktillmidnight
Summary: It’s not like he isn’t aware that his feelings for Eddie are something else, something more, but he can’t think about it, can’t admit it out loud because then it becomes real and if it becomes real then his heart might actually break. The small ache he feels whenever Eddie talks about Ana or when he watches Chris while Eddie is on a date, that he can deal with. The flood of pain he would feel if he had to actively think about the fact that Eddie doesn’t love him back and never will? He couldn’t handle it. So for now, he settles on being sad and lonely and in denial about his own feels for Eddie. He made a promise to Christopher that he wasn’t going anywhere and he intends to keep it, no matter what.OrBuck is in love with his best friend but as long as he doesn't say it out loud, it's not real right? He doesn't have to lose yet another person in a long line of people in his life that have left.-This is a continuation of the one shot I posted last night of a missing scene from episode 8. You don't have to read that one to understand this one, this is the main story.
Relationships: Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Athena Grant, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Bobby Nash, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Henrietta "Hen" Wilson, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Maddie Buckley, Evan "Buck" Buckley & TK Strand, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Taylor Kelly, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Series: You Never Knew [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2203167
Comments: 22
Kudos: 232





	1. Weight On My Shoulders

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Welcome! A few people asked me to turn my one shot into a series which I am more than happy to do. I kind of went off the rails with this one and it's shaping up to be a pretty long story, exploring buddie and chris' relationships and both eddie and buck's characters individually. To sum up I've basically started a novel so congrats you've unleashed a monster. I think I'm going to alternate between Eddie and Buck's point of view, the first chapter is in Buck's since the one shot that inspired all this is in Eddie's. With all that said, I hope you enjoy!

Buck wakes with a start at the sound of his alarm blaring far too close to his head. He scuffles around in the covers searching for his phone before  _ finally _ finding it and turning off the horrific noise. At this point his head is pounding and he’s starting to seriously regret opening that bottle of Jack.

“You set an  _ alarm _ ?” Hen grumbles from the pile of blankets and pillows she’d passed out in on the floor, glaring daggers at Buck. “It’s our day off.”

Buck rubs his temples, eyes slamming shut as he wills his headache to go away. “I forgot to turn it off last night.”

Hen throws a pillow at his head before falling back onto the floor. 

“Good morning, you two,” Albert chirps, appearing at the top of the stairs with a tray in his hands. “Some water and two Albert’s Hangover Cure Specialty Omelettes.”

“Thanks,” Hen mumbles, reaching for the glass of water and plate he hands her.

Albert snorts, turning to Buck and handing him food as well. “Do I want to know why I came home to you both absolutely shit-faced last night?”

Hen groans. “Bad day,” she says around a mouthful of omelette, pointing to herself.

“Supportive friend,” Buck adds, pointing at himself. At that Hen snorts but thankfully doesn’t say anything. 

When Hen had shown up at Buck’s apartment last night angry at the world and clearly on the verge of a breakdown, he had been more than happy to heed her invitation to get wasted and shit on life. It had been only the day after Chris had run away from home and ended up at Buck’s place and as horrible as it sounds, having Hen over to get drunk and talk about her problems had been a welcome distraction to the onslaught of emotions Buck had been dealing with lately. Besides, Hen was his friend and he was almost as angry about the social worker trying to take Nia away as she was. It’s  _ ridiculous _ is what it is. 

“Very supportive by the looks of that empty bottle downstairs,” Albert laughs before adding, “ which I know was full last week.”

“Buck, get him to shut up, my ears are ringing,” Hen snaps, but Albert just laughs again. 

“There’s coffee on the counter when you both eventually make it downstairs.” Albert disappears back down the stairs, leaving Buck and Hen to their own alcohol-induced misery. 

Buck and Hen finish the rest of their breakfast, each of them downing several glasses of water before they start to resemble functioning humans again. 

“What does he put in those omelettes, I genuinely think my headache is going away,” Hen asks, rubbing her temples.

“I think that’s the aspirin,” Buck responds, leaning back against his pillow, eyes closed.

Hen snorts. “True.” She settles back next to Buck on the bed and prods his shoulder. “Do you wanna talk about it, Buckaroo?”

Buck groans and throws his arm over his face. “I can’t believe I talked about it at all.”

“Well, it was a  _ lot _ of whiskey.”

“Which I am never drinking again.”

“Yeah, right.”

Buck opens one eye and glares at Hen. “How about you, how are you doing after everything?”

Hen sighs. “Honestly, still angry. And sad. And about a billion other things that I can’t think about right now. I have no clue what Karen and I are going to do. Speaking of, I should probably head home, I’m not the only one dealing with all this.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right.” Buck pulls himself off the bed and stands there with his eyes closed for a minute while his body remembers how to walk. “Are you going to be good to drive?”

Hen shoots him an exasperated smile. “I’m hungover, not drunk. And feeling better anyways. I gotta thank Albert for those omelettes,” she says as they enter the kitchen.

“You are very welcome,” Albert says, sliding two mugs of coffee across the counter. 

“You’re an angel.” Hen gulps down half the cup before pulling him into a side hug. 

“Don’t worry about it, get home safe!” Albert squeezes her back before heading into the living room, patting Buck’s shoulder as he passes.

Hen finished her coffee before turning back to Buck. “Seriously, thank you for being there for me last night, I really needed it.”

Buck smiles shyly, ducking his head. “Always, Hen, you know that. You’re family. Whenever you need me, I’ll be there.”

“Thanks, Buckaroo,” she says, pulling him into a real hug. “Same goes for me, ok? You need me and I’ll be there, even if it’s so you can cry about your feelings for your best friend.”

“That’s so not what I said,” Buck protests, pulling back.

Hen gives him a disbelieving look. “Buck, I have never seen someone get as worked up about their best friend as you did last night unless they’re in love with them. Besides, last night is far from the first time I’ve thought you might be in love with Eddie. We all love Eddie like family, but only one of us tried to single-handedly claw through forty feet of earth when he went under.”

Buck opens and closes his mouth, not quite sure what to say. Hen gives him a soft smile, grabbing his shoulder as she heads to the door. “Think about it, hm? Thanks again for everything.”

Buck nods, following her to the door. “Keep me updated about Nia, ok? And let me know if you and Karen need anything.”

Hen nods and waves goodbye as she heads out to the hallway. 

Buck stares at his apartment door for a minute, lost in thought. It’s not like he isn’t aware that his feelings for Eddie are something else, something  _ more _ , but he can’t think about it, can’t admit it out loud because then it becomes real and if it becomes real then his heart might actually break. The small ache he feels whenever Eddie talks about Ana or when he watches Chris while Eddie is on a date, that he can deal with. The flood of pain he would feel if he had to actively think about the fact that Eddie doesn’t love him back and never will? He couldn’t handle it. So for now, he settles on being sad and lonely and in denial about his own feels for Eddie. He made a promise to Christopher that he wasn’t going anywhere and he intends to keep it, no matter what.

He climbs the stairs back up to his bedroom slowly after drinking two more cups of coffee. His head no longer hurts, but his heart feels a little like someone dropped a firetruck on it. 

The clock on his bed side table reads 10:03, meaning he should have a text from Eddie by now telling him how yesterday went with introducing Ana to Christopher as Eddie’s girlfriend went.  _ Girlfriend _ . Buck rolls his eyes at the word and grabs his phone. He had avoided Eddie’s texts like the plague last night, choosing instead to live-text the evening to TK Strand from Austin. 

That was a new development in his life, texting with TK and, by extension, his boyfriend Carlos. After TK had mistakenly assumed Buck was hitting on him, Buck had texted him on the drive to El Paso to clear that up. It wasn’t that he was straight or that TK wasn’t great, he just wasn’t interested. Buck had known he was bisexual for years, ever since his soul searching trip across the western hemisphere, so that was never the issue. Then, a week later, TK had texted him with a screenshot of his most recent post on instagram, a picture of Buck, Chris, and Eddie eating ice cream at the park, and had simply said  _ your weird reaction to me thinking you were hitting on me makes a lot more sense now. _

Buck had stared at that text for close to an hour before responding simply with  _??? _ . 

TK had called him laughing before explaining.  _ You’re in love with your best friend dude. _

Buck had spluttered and insisted that  _ no _ he was most definitely  _ not _ in love with Eddie. But it didn’t matter how many times he denied it. TK had the idea in his head now and he was never letting it go. He respected Buck’s feelings about not talking about it, but now Buck was in the habit of texting TK about Eddie all the time, so how could he  _ not _ tease him. 

They talked about other things too, even though Buck had a professional therapist, TK was who he went to with more mundane issues and TK had begun to do the same with Buck, which is how he met Carlos. They have a group chat. TK was currently in the hospital, after getting  _ kidnapped _ , for the love of God, so he’d been pretty entertained to witness Buck’s emotional rollercoaster over text last night. 

A text from TK is the first thing Buck sees when he opens his phone. 

_ Goodmorning, dumbass, hope you’re not dead from alcohol poisoning. _

**Shut up, it wasn’t that bad.** Buck shoots back.

_ It was lmao _

_ Carlos was worried _

**Well, I’m fine, thanks**

**Sorry for spamming you last night**

_ Don’t worry about it, not like I have anything better to do rn _

**How are you feeling by the way?**

_ Better, I just got home, actually _

**Good, heal quickly, worrying about you from thousands of miles away is stressful**

_ You think you’re bad? You should see my parents and Carlos _

Buck snorts at that. 

**Glad I don’t have to lol. Tell them hi from me though**

_ Will do, how’s Eddie and that girl _

**Girlfriend**

**And they’re good, he introduced her to Christopher as his girlfriend yesterday**

_ So you said last night _

_ Also i refuse to call her his girlfriend _

**Well, that’s what she is**

_ Doesn’t mean i have to acknowledge it _

**You’re ridiculous**

_ Pot, kettle _

**Shut up**

_ How are you doing with all that anyways? _

**I’m fine**

_ Right, cause I believe that _

**Whatever, i am, i swear.**

_ Whatever you say _

_ Hey, I have to go, my dad is making lunch for me and carlos, but text me if you need anything, ok? _

**I will, tell everyone hi from me**

TK doesn’t text back and Buck assumes he put his phone down for lunch. He pulls up Eddie’s texts instead and sees that he missed quite a few.

_ Hey, so shockingly Chris did really well with Ana coming over. _

_ I was so sure it was going to blow up in my face _

_ I guess whatever you said must have made an impact so thanks again for that _

_ I think he still kind of sees her as his teacher and not my girlfriend though _

_ So it could still blow up _

_ Are you ok? You haven’t responded since this morning. _

_ I know it’s late I just wanted to check to see if you were still good with doing movie night with us tomorrow? _

_ I guess you had a busy day, text me when you get these _

_ Goodnight, Buck _

Buck sighs and falls back onto his bed. So much for avoiding the heartbreak.


	2. Right There By My Side

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! It's only been a few hours since I posted the first chapter but I finished the first one and thought, oh what the hell? That being said, I don't know how I feel about this chapter, it's a lot longer than the first but I can't decide if I like it or not. So i guess let me know what you think? Anyways, enjoy!

The first thing Eddie does when he wakes up is check his phone. He’s a little worried that Buck ignored his texts all day yesterday. That wasn’t like Buck at all. 

Still nothing, just a text from Ana saying that she had a really good time yesterday. But it is their day off, and if Buck had a long day then he probably just slept in. Not everyone wakes up at eight on their day off to make sure their ten year old makes it to online school in time. 

Eddie sets down his phone and pulls himself out of bed, padding down the hall to wake up Christopher. Chris seems like his usual happy self as he gets dressed for the day and brushes his teeth. Eddie lets out a sigh of relief he hadn’t realized he was holding. Yesterday had been good, Chris had been happy and kind but it could have been a fluke, he could have woken up still angry at his dad, but he wasn’t. 

Eddie pours two bowls of cereal and smiles at his kid as he walks into the kitchen. “Hey buddy, you ready for school?”

Chris grins back. “Yes.”

“Good.” Eddie ruffles his hair before sitting down across from him to eat his own breakfast. 

They eat in silence for a few minutes, which isn’t out of the ordinary, until Chris looks up at him. “Daddy, is Buck still coming over tonight?”

“He should be, pizza and movies, right?” Chris nods. “I’ll text him to double check, but when does Buck ever miss a chance to hangout with you, kiddo?”

“And you,” Chris adds, going back to his cereal.

“That’s right, buddy, both of us,” Eddie says, smiling softly at Chris.

Chris gets settled into school, leaving Eddie to just hang about and do chores around the house. Buck still hasn’t texted him back by ten and he’s starting to feel that worry creep back in when his phone pings and he sighs in relief.

It’s not Buck, it’s Ana.

_ Goodmorning, I hope there weren’t any problems after I left yesterday. Chris seemed to have a good time at least.  _

**Morning. Don’t worry, no issues, I think he’s gonna be ok.**

_ Good! Well, I was thinking maybe you and I could grab dinner tonight, just the two of us? _

**I can’t do tonight, it’s movie night so Buck is coming over with pizza.**

_ Oh! No worries, have fun! We’ll go out another night! _

**Definitely, thanks again for yesterday** .

_ Of course, I had such a good time! Christopher is a great kid, I can’t wait to spend more time with both of you. _

**Yeah, us too.**

_ Great, I guess I’ll talk to you later, Edmundo. _

Eddie doesn’t respond, just tucks his phone back in his pocket. He really likes Ana and he’s glad she and Chris are getting along, the worry about Buck is just gnawing at him.

As if Eddie’s thoughts summoned him, Buck chooses that moment to text back.

_ Hey, sorry I didn’t respond yesterday, hen came over and we got kinda wasted _

Eddie furrows his brows. That’s not like Buck  _ or  _ Hen.

**Everything ok?**

_ Oh yeah, just both needed a break lol _

**Really? You’d tell me if something was up, right?**

Eddie watches the typing bubble appear and disappear a few times before Buck responds.

_ You know I would _

_ Really we just got drunk and hungout, nothing to worry about _

_ And yes, I’m still all set for tonight, I’ll be over around 6 with pizza _

**Awesome, Chris is really excited**

**It’s been a little bit since all three of us got to hangout and I think he missed that**

Buck doesn’t respond right away so Eddie tucks his phone away and gets back to cleaning up. It’s another ten minutes before his phone buzzes with a reply.

_ Yeah, me too _

Eddie smiles stupidly at his phone for a second before shaking his head a going to check on Christopher. 

The rest of the day passes slowly for Eddie, what with Chris in school until three and the house cleaned. He does a home workout for a few hours before taking a shower and lazing about on the couch, scrolling through Instagram. Marjan keeps sending him posts she thinks he’ll like and trying to convince him to post more.  _ You’re a hot guy with a kid! Two things the internet freaking adores! _ Eddie rolls his eyes and smiles, remembering that conversation. Social media just isn’t really his thing.

Buck loves it though. Eddie finds himself pulling up Buck’s account to scroll through again. Nothing new, not in the past few days. The most recent post is a picture of him and Eddie holding the net gun and the small box of food held out towards the camera like they’re in the middle of catching that stupid turkey. The caption is just ‘hide your turkeys fellas, buckley and diaz are on the hunt’. Eddie grins at the silliness and scrolls down. The next post is a series of pictures from the day everyone thought they were jinxed. The cover photo is Buck and Chim holding up bells with Eddie aggressively rolling his eyes. There’s a few more candid pictures from the day including a picture of them all trapped in the truck with a live power pole on top of them that Buck had talked one of the other firefighters into sending him. The caption on that one is ‘someone should check eddie’s hearing because the universe wont stop screaming at him and the rest of us are going deaf’. Eddie rolls his eyes at it, still smiling. He stays true in his stance that  _ jinxes aren’t real buck _ , but Chim and Buck had still managed to convince Chris that they’d been jinxed and Eddie would never hear the end of it.

Chris finishes his homework around four so he and Eddie play some video games while they wait for Buck.

About fifteen minutes before six, Eddie hears the front door open before Bucks voice rings out through the house. “I’ve got pizza!”

“Buck!” Chris jumps off the couch and rushes towards Buck as he sets down the boxes on the counter.

Buck breaks out into a huge grin as he sweeps Chris into the air, spinning around. “Superman! How are you doing, buddy?”

“I’m beating Daddy!”

Buck laughs. “Oh I’m sure you are, no one beats you, kid.”

Eddie grins, resting his hand on Buck’s shoulder as he passes the two of them to grab plates. “Hey, how’re you feeling?”

Buck ducks his head, smirking slightly. “Good, rough morning but fine now.”

Eddie laughs. “Oh I bet.”

Buck shoves his shoulder lightly before turning back to Chris. “So buddy, what are we watching tonight?”

Chris grins and pulls Buck into the living room, already rattling off ideas. Eddie watches them disappear fondly before turning back to the plates, gabbing a few slices for each of them. He can hear Chris and Buck laughing in the other room and his heart warms as he grabs a soda and two beers out of the fridge. 

His phone buzzes as he pulls out the bottle opener, Ana’s name flashing across the screen.

_ Have fun tonight! _

Eddie means to respond, really, he does. But then Chris is calling for him and he grabs everything and heads into the living room, forgetting his phone on the counter. 

Buck looks up from the couch and grins at him. “Chris wants to continue getting through the MCU which puts us at the first  _ Avengers _ movie and then  _ Iron Man 3 _ next time.”

Eddie nods, settling in on the other side of the couch, putting Chris between them like usual. “Sounds like a plan, you ready little man?”

“Yeah!” Chris cheers. Eddie laughs and grabs the remote, pulling up the movie. He grabs his pizza and settles back against the cushions, feeling completely and totally happy. 

They’re having a good time laughing at the movie, empty plates in front of them and drinks in hand. Eddie has his arm stretched out on the back of the couch behind Christopher, just barely touching Buck’s shoulder so he feels rather than hears when Buck lets out a sigh, looking at his phone. 

Eddie gives him a worried look over Christopher’s head. Buck shakes his head and gives Eddie a reassuring smile. Eddie’s not convinced but he doesn’t want to push Buck so he settles back in to watch the rest of the movie. 

They finish  _ Avengers  _ around 8:30 and Chris immediately asks to start  _ Iron Man 3 _ . 

Eddie sighs, seeing that Chris isn’t gonna give up. It is a Friday night though, so at least Chris can sleep in. “How about this, you go get into your pjs and brush your teeth and then we can  _ start _ the movie. We probably won't finish it tonight.”

Chris seems to think this over for a minute before nodding. “Ok, daddy.”

He leaves as fast as he can, clearly excited to start the next movie. As soon as Chris is out of earshot, Eddie turns to look at Buck, who is again looking at his phone, fondly rolling his eyes.

“What’s up?” Eddie asks, nodding towards the phone.

“Huh? Oh, it’s nothing. Just TK complaining about having to take a few weeks off of work.”

Eddie furrows his brow. Buck had told him about TK getting kidnapped, but he didn’t know they texted like this, casually. “Well, he was kidnapped and injured, it’s probably not smart for him to be running into fires right now.”

Buck laughs. “That’s kind of his point. He’s a paramedic now, not a firefighter, so he’s arguing that since he’s not running into fires or anything like that, he should get to go back to work. I had to point out that he was  _ kidnapped _ on a paramedic call so his point is kind of invalid.”

Eddie nods, still feeling a little weird, not really able to pinpoint why. “I didn’t know you and TK were so close,” he says casually. Buck gives him a confused smile.

“It’s not like we’re best friends or anything. It’s just nice sometimes to have a friend who gets the job but isn’t involved in my everyday life,” he explains, firing off another text before tucking his phone back into his pocket. Eddie gets that. He doesn’t talk to the friends he made at the 126 in Austin all that often but he can see the draw.

Before he can respond, Chris comes back into the living room ready for bed. “Can we start it now?” he asks.

Eddie smiles. “Yes, but not the whole movie, remember, we’ll finish it next time.”

Chris nods so Eddie starts the movie and settles back in, still feeling a little odd.

As it turns out, it didn’t matter whether Eddie had let them watch the whole movie or not. Chris nods off a little after nine, curled up on Buck’s chest. Eddie shuts off the tv as soon as he notices. Buck smiles softly down at Chris, his features full of love. Eddie just looks at them for a moment, his heart filling with love as well, before standing up and stretching. 

“Here, I got him,” he whispers, carefully picking up Chris so as not to wake him, his hands getting caught in Buck’s shirt for a second before he pulls away and takes Chris down the hall to his bedroom. He tucks him in softly, carefully removing Chris’ glasses and pressing a kiss to his son’s forehead. He watches his son sleep for a minute, feeling extremely content, before quietly closing the door. 

Eddie can hear Buck talking as he walks down the hall, finding him in the kitchen with his phone tucked between his head and shoulder as he opens two more beers. “I know, and I’m glad you called me,” he’s saying. He looks up and sees Eddie leaning against the wall. “It’s no trouble, I’m just at Eddie's for movie night.” He laughs as something whoever is on the other end of the line says and rolls his eyes. “Oh whatever. Ok, yeah, seriously you can call anytime. Remember, lunch tomorrow at Rosie’s Diner, ok? Alright, I’ll talk to you later, bye.” Buck tucks his phone away before grabbing his beer and looking back at Eddie. “Sorry about that.”

Eddie shakes his head, grabbing his own beer. “No problem, everything ok?”

Buck takes a sip of his beer and sighs, leaning back against the counter. “Yeah, it’s just Taylor. She’s been having a really hard time lately, reporting on almost nothing but misery and death for almost a year now.”

“Taylor Kelly? You guys seeing each other again?” Eddie is starting to feel like he knows less about Buck’s personal life than he thought.

Buck laughs. “I don’t think we were even seeing each other the first time. It was two hook ups. Barely. And no, we’re not seeing each other. She just really needs a friend right now.”

Eddie nods. “Yeah, that makes sense. I can’t imagine being in her position right now.”

“Yeah it sucks.”

There’s a small lag in the conversation, so, for some inexplicable reason, Eddie brings up TK again. “When did you and TK get so close?”

Buck ducks his head, but Eddie swears his cheeks go red at that. “Like I said, we’re not super close. We just text about life and make fun of each other.”

Eddie takes a sip of his beer. “I guess you just never mentioned him until he got kidnapped, so I didn’t know you talked.”

Buck nods. “Yeah, after we stole that fire truck in Texas I guess it made us friends.”

Eddie’s still a little confused, the rest of the 126 was there too and Buck doesn’t mention them ever. “So you talk to all of them? The 126, I mean.”

Buck’s face flushes again. “Sometimes, not as much, though.” He takes a long sip of his drink, apparently thinking something over before he sets it down. “When we were leaving I told TK if he was ever in LA we should get together. He thought I was hitting on him.”

Eddie doesn’t choke on his beer but it’s close. “Oh?”

Buck smiles sheepishly. “I wasn’t but he thought I was and he responded by saying I was awesome but he has a boyfriend and it’s serious. I was serious about hanging out if he was ever in LA and I didn’t want him to be weird so I texted him while we were on the way to your parents’ place to tell him that he’s hot but I wasn’t making a move or anything.” Buck pauses and looks away for a split second. “I guess we’ve just been friends ever since.”

Eddie nods but his mind is kind of stuck on the part where Buck just says that TK is hot, he just wasn’t interested, not that he’s straight or he doesn’t like guys, just that he wasn’t hitting on TK. He hesitates before asking, “Why not just tell him you’re straight?”

Buck looks at him, brows furrowed like what Eddie just said makes no sense before he bursts out laughing. And now Eddie is the confused one. “Holy shit! I thought you knew, shit I’m sorry.” Buck pauses looking up at him, laughter gone replaced with something that looks like nervousness. “Eds, I’m bi.”

Eddie’s not totally sure why he feels like he just got dropped out of an airplane.  _ Buck is bisexual? How did he not know that? _ “You--what? Buck, why didn’t you tell me?” He asks a little desperately. They’re best friends,  _ family _ , why didn’t he know that?

Buck shrugs, still looking nervous. “I wasn’t trying to hide it. I haven’t dated a guy since way before we met and I guess it never came up in conversation. I’m sorry, I really thought you knew.”

Eddie shakes his head. He definitely did  _ not _ know. He’s still trying to wrap his head around it. “I’m sorry, I’m just surprised.” He sees the anxiety written across Buck and immediately feels bad. Quickly, he sets down his beer and moves over to Buck and wraps him up in a hug. “Thank you for telling me.” He feels Buck relax in his arms and when he pulls away, buck is smiling again.

“Don’t apologize for being surprised, Eds. It’s ok.”

Eddie nods. “Does everyone else know?”

Buck’s expression turns thoughtful. “Honestly, I don’t know. I assumed so up until I realized  _ you _ didn’t know. I’ve never outright mentioned it to Bobby and Athena so I guess maybe not? Hen knows ‘cause we’ve talked about it. Maddie knows, obviously, so I assume she’s mentioned it to Chim, maybe? I guess he might not know either.”

Eddie nods, feeling slightly better. “So, to be fair, TK was justified in his assumption,” Eddie jokes. 

Buck shoves his shoulder. “Hey, just cause I’m bi doesn’t mean I was hitting on him. Plus you should see him and his boyfriend Carlos, they’re so cute together. Although they do like to team up when it comes to making fun of me so,” he says with a grin. 

Eddie laughs. “Of course they do.”

He and Buck hangout and talk about anything and everything until Buck notices that it’s almost midnight. 

“I should get home,” he says, looking a little reluctant. 

Eddie nods. “Yeah, we both need to get some sleep. I’ll see you at work on Sunday though.”

Buck groans as he grabs his keys. “Hooray for twenty-four hour shifts.”

“Whatever,” Eddie laughs. “Drive home safe.”

Buck grins. “Always. Thanks for tonight.”

He smiles softly at Eddie for a second before disappearing into the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't plan this chapter at all I kind of just kept writing so if it makes no sense let me know and I'll go back and edit it. join me in clowning over buddie on tumblr @thegirlwithataser


	3. When We Were Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buck gets coffee with Maddie and lunch with Taylor and continues to avoid dealing with his feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is a total filler chapter, we're back to Eddie's POV next and the story starts to pick up a little.

Buck wakes up Sunday morning feeling refreshed and ready to go as compared to the day before. It’s 9am, so he’s got several hours to kill before meeting Taylor for lunch. He rolls over and grabs his phone, killing some time on social media before checking his texts. 

He’s got one from Maddie, asking him if he wants to grab coffee at 10. He shoots back a quick reply saying he’d love to before pulling himself out of bed and wandering into the bathroom to take a shower. His phone pings as he turns on the water with a text from Carlos in the group chat.

_ Buck, please explain to TK that if he wants to get back to work quickly then he should be RESTING. _

TK responds quickly. 

_ Buck, please explain to my boyfriend that I am FINE to go on a run. _

Buck rolls his eyes. 

**Hey idiot you got out of the hospital less than 24 hours ago after being fucking kidnapped**

**Cuddle your boyfriend or something**

_ I CAN’T _

_ He’s at work today _

_ Asshole _

**Yeah, how dare he go to work**

**What a monster**

**Get some rest pls, i stg if you end up back in the hospital i am booking a flight to austin**

_ No don’t tell him that, he’ll break his arm or some shit to get you to visit us, _ Carlos sends back.

Buck laughs.

**Fine, TK you end up back in the hospital and you’ll never hear from me again**

_ Weak threat, Buckley _

**I mean it, listen to carlos**

Buck rolls his eyes at the two of them, feeling a soft ache in his heart knowing he doesn’t have what they have, might  _ never _ have what they have. He turns on his shower playlist still lost in thought before stepping under the steady stream of hot water. 

His mind wanders back to movie night with Chris and Eddie last night. Man, he’d missed the three of them being together. After his conversation with Chris, he’d been worried that maybe the kid was right, and Buck wouldn’t be able to see them as often. But for right now, everything seems safe.

Buck hops out of the shower and begins to towel off his hair. He takes his time going through the motions of his morning routine and dancing around slightly to his music.

It’s just after 10:30 when Buck is finally dressed and ready for the day. Knowing that with LA traffic it’s going to take him about fifteen minutes to get to the coffee shop in Eagle Rock that he and Maddie like. He grabs his keys and a jacket before heading downstairs. 

Albert is hanging out on the couch messing around on his phone when Buck gets down to the kitchen. “Oh, hey bro!” he says through a mouthful of pancake and waves.

Buck snorts. “I’m grabbing coffee with Maddie and then lunch with Taylor, so I won't be back until this afternoon.”

Albert nods. “Ok, I’m going over to Howie’s place later to help him get ready for the baby so I’ll see you tonight?”

“Sure, see ya later.” Buck waves as he heads out the door.

As predicted, traffic is a bitch, but Buck still pulls up to the coffee shop with a minute to spare. He grabs his mask and heads inside where he sees Maddie waiting in line to order. He waves and her eyes brighten when she sees him.

“Hey!” She pulls him into a quick hug before the line moves forward slightly. “How have you been? I feel like it’s been ages since we got any us time.”

Buck laughs. “It has been forever, I have so much to tell you.”

They order and grab their drinks and pastries before finding a table outside. 

“So tell me,” Maddie starts, taking off her mask and folding it on the table. “What’s new in your life?”

Buck sighs. “A lot. Chris ran away from home a few days ago and came to my apartment.”

“ _ Seriously?  _ Eddie must have been terrified. How did he even get to your place?” Maddie shakes her head in disbelief, sipping her decaf latte. 

“He stole Eddie’s phone and called an Uber, at 10 o’clock at night, in  _ LA _ .”

“Everything about that sentence is terrifying.”

Buck nods. “I know, I was freaked out when he showed up and at least I knew he was safe. I called Eddie right away and he was losing his mind.”

Maddie just nods in understanding, staring at Buck with a contemplative look. 

“What?” Buck finally asks.

Maddie shrugs. “Nothing, it’s just-- I don’t know. I’m really glad Chris has you to go to, but why did he run away in the first place? And no offence but why were you the first person he ran  _ to _ ?”

Buck sighs. “It’s complicated, I know. Eddie told Chris he was dating again and Chris kind of lost it. He was really upset.”

“That’s understandable, he’s only ten and he probably felt like Eddie was replacing Shannon.” Maddie pauses, taking a bite if her donut before looking at Buck. “Isn’t it a little soon for Eddie to be introducing Ana to Chris as his girlfriend?”

“Shannon’s been gone for over a year.”

“No, that’s not what I meant. Eddie’s only been seeing Ana for a few weeks, right? And it’s only been a few dates, I know he likes her but that’s not long enough to know if something is going to last, so isn’t it a risk to introduce them?”

“Yeah, I guess it kind of is, but Chris already suspected Eddie was dating and then Eddie had to tell him, so I guess it would have been hard to not introduce them, Chris really wanted to meet her. And it helps that he already knows her outside of being Eddie’s girlfriend.”

Maddi nods slowly. “Yeah, but that could actually make things harder. If Chris already associates her with being his teacher, then it might be difficult for him to see her just as his dad’s girlfriend.”

“I hadn’t really thought about it like that,” Buck admits. “I’ve been kinda stuck on why Chris was so upset in the first place. It wasn’t that he thought Eddie was replacing Shannon, it was more that Shannon is gone. Chris said that everyone leaves, Shannon, his friends, his Abuelita, Carla, he was scared that with Eddie dating again, he was going to lose me too.”

Maddie laughs and Buck stares at her like she’s grown a second head. “Oh, I’m sorry, it’s just-- oh Buck. Chris thought that he was going to lose  _ you _ because Eddie is dating someone else, don’t you get it?”

Buck furrows his brows. “Not really.”

Maddie rolls her eyes fondly before reaching across the table and grabbing Buck’s hand. “Chris thinks that  _ you _ should be with Eddie. Smart kid,” she adds, leaning back and smiling into her coffee.

Buck stutters. “It’s not like that, Eddie and I-- he doesn’t-- I don’t see him like that.”

“Funny, I don’t think I mentioned your feelings. Just what Chris might think. Interesting you brought it up though.”

Buck glares at her. “I can’t believe you.”

Maddie sighs, reaching out and grabbing Buck’s hand. “Look, I know you’re scared; of losing Eddie, of opening yourself up to love, but you said yourself, Evan, you’re sad and lonely, no matter who you try to go out with. You can’t keep running, this is eating at you and it’s not going away.”

“Maddie, he is in a relationship. With a girl that is sweet and smart and great with Christopher. I’m not going to get between that, I  _ can’t _ . He deserves to be happy.”

“And you don’t? Buck, Eddie loves you, you’re his partner, his best friend, and Chris’ favorite person in this world. Don't miss out on something amazing just because you’re scared, trust me, I know.”

“It’s not the same thing, Mads.”

“You’re right, it’s not, but you  _ are _ avoiding this because you’re scared.”

“I know.” It’s weird to admit out loud. “But he’s my best friend and he’s happy and that’s enough for me.”

Maddie gives him a calculating look. “Ok, I won’t push, but remember you deserve to be happy too.”

Buck nods. “I love you, sis, you know that?”

“I know, I love you too.”

They catch up for another hour before Buck’s phone pings with a message and he notices the time, 11:30.

“Shit, I’m running late, I have lunch with Taylor in half an hour downtown.”

Maddie laughs. “Taylor Kelly? You’re dealing with being in love with your best friend by going out with Taylor Kelly?”

“No,” Buck glares at his sister. “I’m not in love with my best friend, ok? And I’m not dating Taylor, we’re just friends, she’s going through a rough time.”

“Right, well, have fun! I’ll talk to you later, ok?”

Buck wraps Maddie up in a soft hug, kissing her on the cheek and then blowing a kiss at his unborn niece before rushing out the door.

He’s ten minutes late to lunch thanks to LA’s traffic, so Taylor is already sitting in a booth looking at a menu when he walks in.

“Well, well, look who finally showed up,” the redhead says, standing up to give Buck a hug. 

Buck rolls his eyes. “Sorry, I was at coffee with Maddie and lost track of time.”

“Don’t worry about it. How’s she doing? Baby Buckley is due soon, right?”

Buck smiles, he’s super excited to be an uncle. “Yeah, within the month. Everyone is really excited.”

“Oh, I bet. You know everyone could use a little excitement these days.” 

“How are you doing, I know things have been hard for you.”

Taylor sighs. “Yeah it’s been depressing, yesterday I had to report on a hospital turning away patients because of a lack of supplies.”

“Damn, that’s awful,” Buck says, giving Taylor a sad smile.”

“It’s my job, it’s been nice having someone to talk to about it though.”

“Hey, I told you, that’s what friends do.”

They share a smile before the waiter comes over and they quickly give their orders.

“So,” Taylor starts, smirking at Buck, “how’s Eddie?” 

Buck groans. “Please, not you too.”

“He’s your best friend!” Taylor exclaims, throwing her hands up in defense. “What, I can’t ask about him?”

Buck rolls his eyes. “He’s good. He’s got a new girlfriend and things seem to be going well.”

“Yeah? You don’t seem too excited for him.”

“I am! Ana seems nice, not that I’ve met her yet. She’s a vice principal, great with kids, Chris loves her.”

“Not as much as he loves you, I bet,” Taylor says, nudging his leg under the table.

Buck flushes bright red. “He just doesn’t know her well enough yet.”

“Hey, none of that. The other day you said you were ready for a meaningful relationship, right? Well, your most meaningful relationship is the one you have with Eddie and Chris, don’t throw that away because you want to make room for someone else in their lives. If this girl is right for Eddie, then she can be in his life without jeopardizing your relationship with them.” 

“I don’t like it when you say things that make sense.”

Taylor laughs, leaning back and taking a sip of her water. “Get used to it, Buckley. Because I’m usually right.”

Buck rolls his eyes. “Yeah, makes sense.”

“Besides, my current joy in life is watching you figure out your feelings like a teenager that’s never heard of love before.”

“I’m gonna regret this friendship aren’t I.”

Taylor smiles. “At least you’re prepared.”

Buck laughs, feeling lighter than he has in weeks. This is good, he really needed this. 

He and Taylor talk and laugh for the rest of lunch, setting up a time to get drinks on Friday.

“Thanks for today,” Taylor says as they stand up. “I really needed it.”

Buck smiles at the ground for a second as they walk toward her car. “Honestly, me too. So I’ll see you friday?”

Taylor nods. “I’ll bring the booze.”

“Counting on it, well I should get going.”

“Alright, text me if you need anything,” Taylor says, leaning up and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“Will do, drive safe.” 

Taylor waves as she gets in her car and pulls away. Buck smiles and shakes his head before heading back to his jeep. 

He pulls out his phone to check his messages. 

There’s two from Eddie. 

_ Hey Chris is with my Abuela tonight, you wanna grab drinks? _

_ Also I wanted to say that I’m really glad you talked me last night, you know you can always trust me _

Buck smiles

**I know, honestly it wasn’t supposed to be like a big coming out moment, I really thought you knew**

_ Yeah but still, I’m glad you’re comfortable in your own skin _

**Thanks eds**

**And about tonight, it’s been a hectic week I think i’m just gonna chill by myself tonight**

The typing bubble appears and disappears for a minute before Eddie texts back.

_ Yeah, no of course, everything ok? _

**All good, just kinda tired and want to be on my A game on the shift**

_ Makes sense, I’ll see you tomorrow then _

**See ya!**

Buck shakes his head and puts his phone away, pulling out into traffic to head back to his apartment. He loves hanging out with Eddie, but he really does just need a break from life right now.

So instead of hanging out with his best friend like he would usually do, Buck gathers his stuff and heads to the gym, hoping that a long workout is just what he needs to distract himself from the cloud of loneliness that has been plaguing him for a while. 

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come scream with me on tumblr @thegirlwithataser


	4. A Strain On My Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea how to summarize this chapter other than firefam at work, so enjoy? Also I promise it starts to pick up after this.

Work on Sunday starts out slow and doesn’t get much better. The team spends the first hour on the clock taking inventory and making sure everything they’ve got on hand is up to date. 

“I’m just saying, watching you and Buck get wasted sounds like fun and I am offended that I wasn’t invited,” Chim says as he rolls up the hose.

“I told you,” Hen says for the third time. “It wasn’t exactly planned. Just two people mad at the world drinking whiskey.”

Eddie looks over at Buck, who’s checking off their tasks on a clipboard. “Why were you two mad at the world.”

Buck shakes his head as Hen sighs. “It’s Nia. The social worker is working with her birth mother on getting them back together.”

Chim stops at that. “What? They can’t do that, can they?”

“I thought Nia’s birth mother was severely neglectful, they’re letting her come back from that?” Bobby asks, leaning against the truck with his arms folded.

“I don’t know,” Hen shakes her head, “I know that she’s been working really hard and she is Nia’s birth mother, and that gives her rights that we don’t have.”

“And like I said the other night, that’s ridiculous,” Buck says, passing Eddie to sit next to Hen on the back of the ambulance. “There is  _ no one _ better for that little girl than you and Karen. You’re both amazing mothers, they’ll see that.”

“Thank you, Buck.” Hen nudges her shoulder against his. “But it’s not that simple.”

“Let us know if there is anything we can do,” Bobby says.

The bell goes off before Hen can respond and everyone rushes to their positions.

It’s an easy call, all things said and done. A guy was cleaning his gun and accidentally shot himself in the foot, then decided to lock himself in the bathroom to hide it from his wife.

“LAFD, sir, we need you to unlock the door so we can help,” Bobby says, trying the handle.

“No! I’m fine! You all can just go home!”

“Bill, you idiot! I heard the gun go off and there’s a bullet embedded in the floor!” the wife screams before resuming her pacing. 

“Don’t worry,” Buck says to her, “we’ll get him out and get him fixed up good as new.”

“You fucking better so I can kill him myself!” 

Eddie meets Buck’s eyes over her head and both of them have to stifle a laugh.

“Buck!” Bobby calls. “Get the battering ram, he’s not coming out on his own.”

“On it, Cap!” Buck slips from joking to professional quickly, running back out to the truck and reappearing a minute later with the battering ram. “Clear out!”

He rushes forward, swinging the battering ram and getting the door open. Eddie rolls his eyes internally at how happy Buck looks to get to do this. 

As soon as the door is open, Buck steps back as Chim and Hen rush forward to the man leaning up against the tub, blood pooling around his lower leg. 

“Lucky the bullet went through-and-through,” Hen says as she patches him up.

“Yeah, lucky,” the guy grumbles as Eddie passes the backboard into the small bathroom. 

Chim snorts. “Trust me, they’ll get you sorted out in no time at the hospital.”

“I’m sorry,” the guy says to his wife as they get him on a stretcher and start rolling him out of the house.    
  


“Yeah, you better be. I  _ told _ you to be careful with that thing.”

They keep bickering as Hen and Chim load him up into the ambulance. Eddie shakes his head, walking up to stand next to Buck as they load everything else back onto the truck. “You ever see something so stupid you just have to wonder how that person is still alive?”

Buck snorts. “In this city? Every day, Eds.”

Eddie laughs and they climb back into the truck, headed back to the station. 

It’s just barely ten by the time they’re back at the house, only two hours into the twenty-four hour shift and Eddie is already feeling bored. Buck rushes upstairs as soon as they pull in, making a b-line for the kitchen. Chim and Hen won’t be back for another few minutes, having had to drive Bill to the hospital, so Bobby and Eddie just follow Buck upstairs. 

“Who’s on for a game?” Buck asks, gesturing to the pool table while holding three pancakes. 

Eddie rolls his eyes fondly at him while Bobby laughs. “Nah, I have to put breakfast away before another call comes in.”

“I’m in,” Eddie says, grabbing a cue from under the table. “I love taking your money.”

“Oh it’s like that?” Buck asks, raising one brow at him, lips quirked up in a smirk. 

Eddie smirks right back, “Oh yeah it’s like that.”

Bobby rolls his eyes at the two of them from behind the counter but doesn’t say anything. 

“So,” Eddie starts as Buck lines up his shot, “how is Maddie doing, baby’s almost here.”

Buck misses. “She had a little bit of a freakout last week, pandemic and hospitals and all that, but Chim got her over it after a few days.”

“I can see where she’s coming from, it’s a scary time to be having a kid.”

“Yeah, but wanting to have the baby at home was an overreaction in my opinion.”

“Hey people have home-births all the time. She’s not crazy.”

Buck laughs. “Yeah but as a paramedic and a former nurse turned 911 dispatcher, it feels like she should be more worried about what could go wrong when they're alone, not surrounded by doctors that could deliver a baby in their sleep.”

Eddie nods. “Fair point.” 

“Ooh, what are we playing for?” Chim asks, appearing at the top of the stairs followed closely by Hen. 

“Buck’s humiliation,” Eddie responds, sinking another ball just to prove his point. 

Chim and Hen burst out laughing as Buck looks at Eddie in mock hurt. “You wound me, Eddie.”

“I’m pretty sure you’ve got it coming.” Eddie smirks at Buck and bumps his shoulder as he rounds the table. 

“You’re gonna regret saying that,” Buck says, lining up a shot and promptly missing.

“You know, somehow, I don’t think I will.” 

The game doesn’t last very long and predictably, Eddie wins. 

“I don’t know how you beat me  _ every _ time,” Buck says, collapsing onto the couch in defeat.

Eddie laughs, grabbing a water from the fridge and joining him by sitting on the armrest. Buck has stretched himself across the length of the couch, leaving no room for anyone else.

“Because you suck at pool, Buck,” Hen says, turning a page in her medical book.

“Not true, I beat Chim last week!” he protests.

“That’s because I also suck at pool, the only difference is I can admit it.”

Buck gives Chim the finger before tilting his head to look up at Eddie. “Just once, could you let me win?”

Eddie’s response gets stuck in his throat when he looks down and meets Buck’s eyes, the angle they’re at very new to him. He laughs, hoping to clear his throat. “Where’s the fun in that?”

Buck shoves his leg and the next thing Eddie knows he’s falling off the couch, whatever happened before forgotten in his haste to shove Buck back. 

They get two more calls before lunch rolls around, a choking outside a cafe that they take care of quickly, and a minor car accident, only a few minor injuries. Despite that, it still takes them over an hour to get everyone out of their cars, checked over, and loaded into the ambulance to head to the hospital so by the time they get back to the firehouse it’s 12:30 and Buck is complaining about being hungry.

“Calm down, Buck,” Bobby says. “There’s baked mac’n’cheese, a salad, and some chicken, so as soon as Chim and Hen are back we can dig in.”

Buck groans and face plants onto the couch cushions and Eddie rolls his eyes fondly at him.  _ What a dork _ , he thinks, grinning at his best friend from across the room. 

“Eddie, you mind helping me put everything out?” Bobby asks as he starts bulling food out of the fridge.

Eddie nods. “Sure thing, Cap.”

“So, Eddie, how did introducing Ana as your girlfriend to Christopher go?”

Eddie feels his cheeks heat up. “Oh, uh, it went really well. Chris always liked Ana when she was his teacher and he seemed excited to see her again.”

Boddy smiles gently. “Well it’s good that he likes her as his teacher, but Ms. Flores his teacher and Ana your girlfriend are different people.”

“What do you mean?” Eddie asks, taking the hot plate of mac from Bobby.

“I mean, I know you’ve told him she’s your girlfriend and I know he’s now spent time with her as your girlfriend, but does he really understand what that means?”

Eddie opens his mouth to respond that  _ obviously he does _ but thinks better of it. Does Christopher really understand the change? “I don’t know, I think he probably kind of does, it might just take spending some more time with her in that capacity for him to really understand.”

“I know he had a bad reaction to the idea of you dating, what changed that?”

“To be honest, I don’t really know. Chris ran away after I told him, stole my phone and called a ride to Buck’s apartment.”

Bobby raises his eyebrows at that. “Oh?”

Eddie nods. “I was terrified but Buck called as soon as Chris got there so I knew he was safe. I know the gist of their conversation, but whatever Buck said must have really gotten to him because after everything cooled down, Chris said he wanted to meet my girlfriend and that he wanted me to be happy.”

Bobby nods slowly, looking deep in thought. Meanwhile, Buck has gone suspiciously still and quiet over on the couch. Bobby speaks up again, pulling Eddie back into conversation. “Well, it’s a good thing Chris had Buck to talk to about that,” Bobby says, voice carefully light.

“Oh trust me, I’m so grateful Buck is there. I don’t know what I’d do without him, Chris could--”

“Damn, food smells good, Cap,” Hen says, marching right up to the table. 

Buck launches himself off the couch. “Finally, let's eat.”

Chim laughs. “Yeah I can see you’re really wasting away over there.”

Buck glares at Chim. “Just sit down, rebar head.”

“Low blow, Buckley,” Chim says, hand over his scar as if it still hurts.

Buck throws a roll at him. “Hey, are we children?” Bobby asks sternly, sitting down as well.

Eddie laughs. “Only Buck, Cap.”

Buck smiles brightly before reaching for the food laid out in front of them and loads up his plate. 

Eddie shoots him a smile back as he settles into the chair next to him. 

His phone buzzes as he takes the pasta Buck offers him. He pulls it out quickly and sees that it’s a text from Ana.

_ Hey, I saw an ad for a painting in the park thing tomorrow afternoon and I thought Chris might like something like that, do you guys want to go? _

Eddie looks up at Buck for a split second before looking back at his phone, a small bead of guilt settling in his stomach.

**You’re right, Chris would love that, but there’s a small get together tomorrow for Maddie and Chim, kind of a baby shower, so we can’t miss it.**

Ana texts back right away.

_ Oh, a party right now, is that safe? _

_ And I didn’t know Chim was having a baby, that’s so exciting! _

Eddie smiles, he’s pretty excited about the baby, Chim and Maddie are family to him.

**We’re keeping it small, just family and I think Maddie’s friend Josh**

**Yeah everyone’s so excited, we’re calling her the 118 baby because it’s Chim’s kid and Buck’s niece**

Ana takes a little longer to respond and Eddie is in the middle of listening to Buck talk about the plan for tomorrow when his phone finally buzzes again.

_ Buck’s niece? _

**Yeah, Buck’s sister, Maddie, is dating Chim, it’s really great for both of them, given their history**

_ What do you mean? _

**It’s a long story, I’ll tell you another time, right now everyone is just really happy for them. Chris is so excited to meet the baby**

_ Yeah, I bet _

“Eddie, you and Chris can still come, right?” Buck is looking at him hopefully and Eddie tucks his phone back in his pocket. 

“Of course, we wouldn’t miss it for the world, you know that.”

“Good,” Chimney says, “Everyone needs to be there.”

Eddie laughs. “Trust me, I don’t want to be on the receiving end of Maddie Buckley’s rage for missing it.”

Everyone laughs. “Trust me, I wouldn’t either. Karen hasn’t shut up about it for the past 24 hours, I think she’s using it as a distraction,” Hen says.

“If it helps keep her mind off of things, she is free to do anything she wants the rest of this pregnancy.”

“Thanks, Chim.”

Buck nudges his shoulder up against Eddie’s while he starts talking to Bobby about the menu for the party and Eddie smiles softly, looking down at his plate and forgetting that he was in the middle of a conversation with someone else. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come scream with me about this show on tumblr @thegirlwithataser


	5. Go On and Say It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’re more than Eddie’s best friend, Buck. You’re his partner, and that is what might change. Are you ok with being just his best friend?” Buck furrows his brows at Bobby, not quite getting what he means. “Think about it, ok?”
> 
> With that, Bobby gets up from the table and heads into the kitchen, pouring himself a cup of coffee before disappearing into his office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is SO LONG i'm so sorry but honestly I really enjoyed writing this one so i hope you enjoy it!!!

The next several hours of their shift feels like a never ending wave of calls. They get called to a three-alarm fire in a massive apartment complex around nine and spend the next five hours evacuating everyone and putting out the fire. He and Eddie spend most of their time inside the building making sure each and every apartment is cleared and by the time they roll back into the firehouse around two in the morning he feels like he’s only a few seconds from death. Hundreds of people live in that building and fourty have been confirmed dead so far. None of them died in Buck’s arms, which he considers a tiny victory, but mostly everything hurts and he just wants to sleep. 

“Come on,” Eddie says softly from behind him, nudging Buck forwards. “We can sleep when we aren’t covered in ash.”

Buck only nods as he lets Eddie guide him towards the shower.

He spends a few minutes just letting the water fall around him, washing away the pain just slightly. 

Eventually, he scrubs the physical evidence away and climbs out of the shower, his heart feeling like lead in his chest. He pulls a hoodie over his head and vaguely registers that it feels softer than usual before heading out to the bunks and crawling under the covers. 

“Buck?” Eddie says into the darkness after a minute.

“Hm?” Buck responds, already feeling sleep fade in.

“Is that my hoodie?”

That wakes him slightly. He sits up and looks down at the sweatshirt groggily. It’s grey and faded and says  _ El Paso  _ across the chest. 

“Oh.” He just looks down at himself for a minute before looking up at Eddie. “You left a few clothes at my house when you left after quarantine. I must have grabbed it by accident this morning. You can have it back.”

Eddie shakes his head a little too quickly. “No, uh, you can keep it.”

“Oh, ok,” Buck says, laying back down. “Thanks.”

“Goodnight, Buck,” he hears Eddie say quietly from the other bunk. 

“Goodnight, Eddie.” And finally, sleep overtakes him. 

When Buck wakes up again it’s because his phone is buzzing. 

“Hello?” he asks tiredly, not remembering to check the caller ID.

“Shit, what time is it there?”

“ _ TK? _ ” 

“Yeah, hey. Sorry, it's like 6am here and I forgot about time zones,” he says a little sheepishly. “I’ll call back later.”

“No, it’s fine, I’m awake now, what’s up, why are you awake at 6am?” Buck slowly pulls himself out of bed and walks into the bathroom so as not to wake anyone else.

“Couldn’t sleep, I’ve been doing nothing but sleeping for a few days and I’m restless.”

“Makes sense,” Buck says, yawning.

“Anyway, Carlos and I were talking and we had an idea. I can’t go back to work for another week and Carlos’s captain says he deserves some time off after the stress of the investigation and the whole, ya know, kidnapping thing.”

“Yeah you two deserve a break.”

“Well, we were thinking we could drive out to LA and hang with you for a few days. See the sights when you’re on shift and meet the rest of the 118 when you’re not.”

Buck instantly perks up. “Uh, yeah, that sounds  _ awesome _ . But it’s a 20 hour drive, are you sure?”

“20 hours isn’t bad when you’re used to working shifts longer than that.”

Buck laughs. “Yeah, that’s a fair point. When were you thinking about coming?”

“We were thinking maybe leaving this afternoon, getting in around 8 tomorrow morning your time?”

“That sounds perfect, I can kick Albert out for a few days, Chim and Maddie would let him sleep on the couch for a few days.”

“You really don’t have to do that, we’re looking at hotels right now.”

“Tell you what, let me ask him when he wakes up in a few hours and I’ll get back to you?”

“Yeah, sure, let me know. Yay, I’m excited!”

Buck grins. “Me too, I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

“Tomorrow,” TK confirms. “In the meantime, get some sleep, Buck.”

“I plan on it. I’ll text you later ok?”

“Sounds good, bye, Buck!”

“Bye.”

Buck tucks his phone into the pocket of his sweatpants and grins, feeling more excited than he has in a while.

He heads out into the kitchen and puts on a pot of coffee, he’s awake now, no point in falling back asleep again with only four hours left on his shift. He opens the fridge and grabs a bottle of water, intending on killing some time in front of the TV until everyone else wakes up or they get a call.

“Morning, Buck.”

“Jesus!” Buck jumps and drops his water. “Bobby? Why aren’t you asleep?”

He shrugs from his spot at the table. “I got about an hour, but there’s paperwork that needs doing and I don’t usually sleep too well after fires.”

Buck nods, heading over to join him. “Yeah, that makes sense. How are you doing?”

“I should be asking you that,” Bobby says, putting down his pen and giving Buck his full attention. “You seem tired lately.”

Buck shrugs. “Casualty of the job, right, Cap?”

Bobby smiles ruefully. “I meant more than usual. I know you heard Eddie telling me about how Christopher came to  _ you _ when he was upset with his father, that must have been difficult for you.”

Buck sighs. “Not for the reasons you’re thinking, he wasn’t trying to ‘get me on his side’ or anything like that he…” Buck pauses and takes a deep breath. “He was scared that with Eddie dating he would lose me, that I would be around less.”

Bobby nods slowly. “What did you tell him?”

“That I’m not going anywhere, he won't lose me just because Eddie has a girlfriend. He’s family.”

“Yes, but your relationship might change. Eddie and Chris used to spend all their free time with you, now there’s another person for them to spend all of their free time with.”

“Yeah, but if anything I see Chris more now. I watch him whenever Eddie’s on dates, and obviously Eddie and Ana are going to want some time by themselves occasionally.”

“True, so you’ll be around Chris more and Eddie less, how are you doing with that?”

Buck sits back. “It's not like I’m never going to see Eddie, we work 24 hour shifts together all the time and I still spend time with him and Chris, we do movie night once a week. He’s still my best friend, Ana being around doesn’t change that.”

“You’re more than Eddie’s best friend, Buck. You’re his partner, and  _ that _ is what might change. Are you ok with being just his best friend?” Buck furrows his brows at Bobby, not quite getting what he means. “Think about it, ok?”

With that, Bobby gets up from the table and heads into the kitchen, pouring himself a cup of coffee before disappearing into his office.

Buck shakes his head, this is too much for 4:30 in the morning, instead reverting to his original plan and settling onto the couch, clicking on the TV.

  
  


The last few hours of their shift are easy. Bobby makes them waffles for breakfast, they help out with a car accident, and 8am is there sooner than they realize, along with the end of their shift. 

“Remember, everybody, five o’clock at Bobby and Athena’s for the baby shower!” Chim calls out as he heads out to his car.

“You’ve reminded us a billion times, Chim,” Hen says, rolling her eyes fondly. “We’ll all be there.”

“Good shift, everybody, I’ll see you all tonight!” Bobby says, hopping into his car. 

“Hey, do you want to come over for lunch with Chris before the party?” Eddie asks as he and Buck walk towards their cars. 

“Can’t, sorry, I gotta ask Albert if he’s cool crashing at Chimney’s place for a few days and then I’m going to sleep until 3 before going over to Bobby’s to help set up,” Buck explains, throwing his bag in the backseat of the Jeep.

“Why does Albert need to crash at Chim’s?” Eddie asks, leaning up against the side of his truck.

“Oh,” Buck brightens. “TK and Carlos are going to come visit for a few days.”

“Really? Shouldn’t TK be resting?”

“He’s ok mostly, a minor concussion but he still has another week off of work and Carlos earned himself some vacation days for the unfair investigation. They’re getting a little restless in Austin so they asked if they could visit for a few days.”

Eddie nods. “Oh, ok. Well, that should be fun. When are they coming?”

“Should be in by tomorrow morning.”

“Cool,” Eddie says, sounding a little odd. “Then I guess I’ll see you tonight.”

“Yeah, I’ll see you tonight, text if you need anything,” Buck says, hopping into the driver’s seat.

“Will do,” Eddie says, shooting him a smile and waving as he gets into his own car.

Buck waves back and pulls out into the ugly LA morning traffic.

It takes him a ridiculous forty-five minutes to get back to his apartment and is starting to feel exhausted again by the time he manages to unlock his door.    
  


“Hey, bro, how was work?” Albert asks from his spot on the couch, watching some daytime sitcom. 

“Exhausting,” Buck replies, tossing his back on the floor by the stairs. “Hey can I ask you a favor?”

“Sure,” Albert says, switching off the TV. 

“I’ve got two friends driving out from Texas for a few days, they offered to get a hotel but I figured I’d ask if you could stay at Chim’s for a few days.”

“Sure!” Albert grins, surprisingly energetic about it. “I’ve been wanting to get in more brother time before the baby comes anyway, let me call and ask.”

Albert disappears into his room for a minute so Buck takes his stuff up to his room and changes into a different pair of sweatpants and a clean t-shirt.

“Chim says sure!” Albert calls from downstairs. 

“Ok, awesome! Thank you so much, man!” Buck yells back before pulling out his phone and opening up his messages with TK.

**Hey, Albert says he’s cool crashing at Chimney’s for a few days so you two don’t need to bother with a hotel room**

TK texts back right away

_ Awesome! I’ll let Carlos know! _

**Great, text me when you guys get on the road**

_ Will do, have fun at the baby shower today! Tell everyone hi  _

**I will, see you later**

_ Oh you know it, I’m so excited _

**Me too, but for now I’m gonna pass out, just got off a shift**

_ Oof, yeah, get some sleep, see you tomorrow! _

**See you!**

Buck sets an alarm for noon, figuring he can probably fit a workout and shower in before he heads over to Bobby’s later.

  
  


Buck wakes up on time, finishes a workout and showers right on schedule, which is out of character for him. He spends a minute sifting through his clothes trying to find something nice to wear for his sister’s babyshower and eventually settles on a white t-shirt, a dark red button up and dark jeans. He rolls up the sleeves on the button up before grabbing his keys and heading out.

It’s rush hour, so it takes him just under an hour to get to the Grant-Nash household. Athena opens the door when he knocks and breaks into a warm smile. “Buck! Thank you for coming over to help set up. Come in!” She ushers him inside and closes the door behind him. In the living room, Harry is standing on top of a chair, hanging up streamers. Buck can smell Bobby hard at work cooking in the kitchen, and when he walks by, he sees May tying balloons outside on the back porch. 

“Buck, try this,” Bobby says, holding out a fork with some form of meat on it. Buck lens forward and takes a bite, immediately feeling all warm and at home.

“It’s great, Bobby. Maddie’s going to love it.”

“Good.” Bobby smiles and turns back to the stove.

Buck turns to Athena. “Where do you need me?”

He spends the next hour hard at work with Athena and the kids and by the time they’re done, the living room looks like a baby catalogue threw up on it. Different shades of pink and green decorate the space, with a small pile of presents started on the coffee table. Bobby’s got all the food set up like a buffet on the kitchen table and there's a small fire in the firepit outside. And when the first knock at the door sounds, they’re ready.

Hen, Karen, Denny, and Nia are the first to arrive, bearing gifts for Maddie and Chim and wine for everyone else. 

There’s clearly a weight on Karen and Hen’s shoulders as they greet everyone, but no one says a thing. This is a celebration. 

Josh arrives next, nervously greeting everyone else. He’s met them all a few times, but this is the first time he’s been at a party with them and the only one he really knows is Buck. “Hey, thanks for inviting me.”

Buck gives him a quick side hug. “Of course, you’re Maddie’s best friend, she’ll be so happy you’re here.”

Josh heads into the kitchen as another knock sounds at the door. Buck rushes to open it and finds Eddie and Chris standing on the other side. In a moment of pure weakness, Buck let’s his eyes trail over Eddie, who is looking absolutely sinful in a dark blue henley that fits a little snugly, showing off everything the man has to offer, and a pair of jeans that  _ again _ , fit him just right. Buck snaps his eyes back up to Eddie’s face and prays to any God out there that his best friend didn’t notice him checking him out. “Hey! You made it!”

Eddie grins as they walk in. “I told you, I wouldn't miss it for the world. The guests of honor here yet?”

“Not yet, should be here soon,” Buck says before turning to Christopher. “Hey, buddy!”

“Buck! We brought presents,” The kid says excitedly, holding the two bags out as proof. 

“Why, thank you, Christopher, let me take those from you.” Buck takes the two presents and sets them next to the growing pile on the coffee table. The baby isn’t even born yet and it’s already spoiled. 

“Hey, Chris, there's Denny and Harry, let's go say hi,” Eddie says, nudging Chris forward. Buck smiles a little stupidly at them as they walk away. 

“You gotta work on your poker face, loverboy,” Hen says, walking up to his side and watching her son say hello to Chris. 

Buck rolls his eyes at her. “Yeah, well, I never was very good at poker.”

Hen laughs and shoves his shoulder. “Very true. Come on, I want a beer.”

Buck follows her into the kitchen, taking a beer when she offers it. He checks his watch and looks back towards the front door. Maddie and Chim should be here any minute. 

As if summoned, there’s a knock at the door. Eddie waves Buck over as Athena runs to grab the door. Buck instinctively places a hand on Christopher’s shoulder as his sister and Chimney appear at the top of the stairs.

“Congratulations!” everyone yells out. Chim laughs, his arm around Maddie’s waist as she grins, tears brimming in her eyes.

“Oh my god, you guys!” She gives Athena a huge hug. “You didn’t have to do all this!”

“Sure we did! This is a big deal, you deserve a big party!” Athena says, guiding Maddie and Chim down the stairs. 

“Hey sis, do you like it?” Buck says, rushing forward to give Maddie a hug.

“Buck, this is  _ perfect _ .”

“It should be,” Eddie says, appearing at Buck’s shoulder. “He spent half the day setting this up.” 

Maddie grins at both of them. “Well, I love it.”

Buck smiles, dripping his head shyly before looking back up. “I’m glad you like it, you deserve it. Well go, say hi to everyone!”

Maddie presses a kiss to his cheek before leaving to give Josh a hug. 

Eddie puts a hand on Buck’s shoulder to get his attention. “This is a good thing you did, Maddie looks really happy.”

Buck nods. “I really just want her to enjoy herself, I know she’s nervous about giving birth.”

“Well, you’re a good brother.”

“Thanks, Eddie.” They look at each other for a second, just smiling, before the noise around them grabs their attention and they snap back to reality.

Buck spends the next half hour hanging out with everybody. He chases the kids around the backyard for a bit, holding Nia on his shoulders as she giggles happily. 

Eventually, Bobby calls out dinner being ready and everyone rushes into the kitchen, piling their plates with his food and settling around the house to eat.

Buck joins Chris and Eddie on the chairs outside on the patio. 

Without really thinking, Buck takes Chris’ plate and cuts up his chicken into bite sized pieces and hands the plate back. Eddie stares at him with an indescribable look on his face before turning back to his own food and digging in.

After everyone has finished eating they gather in the living room for Maddie and Chim to open their gifts. Buck settles in next to his sister and Eddie and Chris join him on the couch. 

Opening presents goes by quickly, Maddie getting increasingly emotional as they all chat happily about the things she’s received. Throughout the whole ordeal Buck is very aware of Eddie’s arm pressed against his own, the other man’s body heat radiating off of him.

Eddie doesn’t leave Buck’s side all night and even though that’s not actually unusual for the two of them, Buck still catches Hen winking at him or raising her eyebrows at them from across the room. He ignores this though, he’s happy tonight and no amount of teasing will change that.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come scream with me on tumblr @thegirlwithataser

**Author's Note:**

> First chapter is done! Up next is Eddie's POV and I've already written about half of it, so keep an eye out for that upload sometime soon! Also feel free to come scream with me over this show and this ship on tumblr @thegirlwithataser


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